Toobers bra-a-a-ah....

Fuuug...

So first my monitor gets all racialist and decides it doesn't want to display the color black anymore and then I go buy a new monitor and it turns out that one has epilepsy and as soon as I throw up my hands in the air like Jeez, can't a gal get a break?, my computer gets fried or implodes or both or I don't know...shit's done though. My hypothesis is that I have some sort of evil, sadistic electricity up in my sockets...like that dude from the movie Shocker or that one gremlin in the Gremlins 2 who gets all like, electrical, y'know...but for reals in my room.

But this is a good thing. Whilst scrubbing off the random clumps of blood and feces that managed to accrue all over my body in the subsequent haze/meltdown that followed the loss of my computer, I noticed that I have become rather soggy and frail from my overindulgence. And thusly, I thought to myself, maybe living off of a strict diet of Red Bull and Radiation isn't such a good idea after all. And maybe there's a whole world out there, a whole REAL world, just beyond that door. And maybe, just maybe, those bird outside singing their twee little bird songs, maybe they are singing to me! "Oh won't you come play with us?" they happily cry, while bandying about to and fro amidst the warmth of the sun. Weeeeee!!! And the clouds are winking and the flowers are waving and there is much skipping and frolicking and ah! why look at the sun, oh how marvelous! he's got sunglasses and two scoops of raisins to boot! Hello my whimsical friend! and then spinning and spinning and oh darling! remember how we spun and we laughed and laughed till I was just dizzy with laughter!!



Point being, it's a good thing that I have a laptop, otherwise you'd all be dead by now...

a-giggle!


But really now, because I don't have my whole wide array of clickity clack clonk(read: links)on this computer, my worldlywibwebbing(ok, ok, I'll stop) is severly limited, meaning my laptop is functioning kind of like these, only with less of a "you've got to be fucking kidding me" factor. But it's Allll good, cuz I still got my YOoby TOOoOoOby Faver-E-toes (no, dude, seriously stop) saved up so bing bang bong winky binky Fantastic Max Megamix up in your eyeholes. Ya hrrrd me?


These three characters should have an entire show on animal planet documenting their mishaps. The Serge Gainsbourg factor takes this to the next level.


Betcha didn't know Yahoo Serious could get down like that huh?


Ok, let this one load up for a second cause the first 3 minutes is just Tony Jaa getting all bent out of shape over some elephant, but when the fighting goes down, this gets massively intense. And then after dude wrecks the most shop ever wrecked....


He goes on School Girl TV and kicks the illest freestyle ever concievable. Business man guy has never even attempted to dance once in his life but all the sudden he's just compelled to lose it. Crazy, yo. Jet Li and Jackie Chan are officially done.


Speaking of loopy asians, dude you know that in Japan, TechnoHitler and Co. can pack entire ampitheatres full of screaming fans? Whoa whaaat.


Seriously, Death Cab for Cutie, if you need any more evidence that your shit sucks, here's a great little peak into the minds at your fanbase. Dude holds his cellphone up for their torchlight song. What a douchebag. However, this is kind of suspect, mainly because of that dude doing a dead on Scorpion-from-Mortal-Kombat, "GET OVER HERE" and guy with the camera not getting severly beaten 2 seconds later. So if this IS a little orchestrated prank, well then....you guys still suck. sorry, but really...just stop.


Ok, so it's all been wacky today, so here's some sophisticated funny. Wes Anderson's American Express Commercial. All I can say is he does what he does incredibly well. It feels like one of his movies and he actually brings some integrity to a commercial and he doesn't sell himself short. Good stuff.


Sorry for being such an asshole today. I won't do that 5 year old kid with Jolt cola meets E-40 nonsense anymore...I promise. And I might have to lay off the America's Funniest Home Videos shtick too. Next post is gonna be all mixes, I swear. In fact, in order to get geared up for it, here's the official new best thing ever.



Yep, told ya. How synch-ed up is this shit!